One mistake you should never make in life, is to allow yourself to be recruited by someone, to hate another person who has not wronged you. Hear this: We must avoid taking hasty conclusion because of what others are saying about someone else.
What people say about others, says a lot about them. I am repeating this more directly: The things you say about others says a lot about you! I can tell a lot about a person by what they choose to see in others.
CHARACTER ASSASSINATION is a pervasive and destructive phenomenon that is found everywhere. Character assassination is the deliberate, malicious, unjustified, and sustained effort to damage the reputation or credibility of an individual. Character assassination is the slandering of a person usually with the intention of destroying public confidence in that person. Character assassination is the act of lowering one’s character in a bid to ruin the character of others.
False allegations are the most chronic form of mental abuse. When people cannot kill your dreams and purpose, they will try to assassinate your character. There are some people that your spirit will always irritate their demons! Once they realize hating is not working, they start telling and spreading lies about you. People are assassinated once but ‘Character Assassination’ kills daily! Character assassination is a form of emotional violence against others.
Someone once said, “A friend of my enemy is my enemy.” One of the things that hinder us from living a fulfilling and inclusive life is bringing past bias and sentiments into present relationships. A friend of your enemy is not necessarily your enemy; it all depends on intentions and contributions. God can use your perceived enemy’s friend to bless you!
7 critical ‘DON’Ts’ that you really need to guard yourself against.
REFUSING to get TRAPPED in them will help you live a more PRODUCTIVE, FULFILLING, and UNBIASED life. They are:
- Do not conclude about people because of what others say about them: Never draw up conclusions based on what others tell you about someone. It is a lack of social intelligence that makes people draw conclusions about others based on what other people say about them. I know you have heard about emotional and financial intelligence, but there is something called social intelligence. This is the kind of intelligence that keeps you sane even when others are trying to pollute your mind against someone else until you have thoroughly confirmed the veracity of the claims before you. Judges are trained to have this kind of intelligence to avoid biased judgments.
- Do not inherit other people’s enemies: It is a total lack of education and enlightenment when you automatically make your friend’s enemies your own. Do not make people your enemies just because they are not on good terms with your friends.
- Do not use your children as weapons of war: God can use your perceived enemies to bless your children Stop using them to fight those you do not like. You may often need to guard them with their choice of friends but never plant the seed of discord in the heart of your children against someone else.
- Do not gang up with others to hate someone: Do not join the majority to hate someone – you may realize that the person has no offense. Someone said, “If you don’t see it with your own eyes or hear it with your own ears. Do not invent it with your small mind and share it with your big mouth”. Never join the multitude to hate someone else.
- Do not be used as a weapon in other people’s battles: It is not every battle that you must involve yourself in. Refuse to be used as weapons in other people’s battles. When people fight dirty, refuse to take sides. Observe deeply before concluding finally.
- Do not hate people just because they do not behave like you: That someone is not your tribe does not make them your enemy. It is a waste of education if the only people you like are those that are like you. The greatest proof of our education is in how we respond to people whose opinions are different from ours. People who think their opinions are superior to others are most prone to overestimating their relevant knowledge and ignoring chances to learn more.
The people who do not think like you are your greatest source of enlightenment. It is normally people that are not like us that help us grow the most. Companies that had maximized growth are really those that value diversity and inclusion.
- Do not judge people until you know the whole story: Someone once said, “Beware of the half-truth. You may have gotten hold of the wrong half”. Do not judge other people’s choices without understanding their reasons.
If people say something bad about you or judge you as if they know you, do not easily get affected. Remember this, dogs bark if they do not know the person. People who are intimidated by you talk about you with hopes that others will not find you so appealing.
Stay away from people who talk bad about others daily; these kinds of people carry a negative spirit, and a negative spirit is contagious. The real problem is not that they are unhappy with others, but they are unhappy with themselves.
Stop the destructive habit of talking about people behind their back. Talking badly about someone else while they are not there to defend themselves says more about you than the person you are talking about. When you have issues with people, try and discuss it with them. Stop discussing it with others. Someone once said, “Don’t talk about me until you have talked to me”. Stop spreading false information and rumours about others.
Stop creating walls of contention, rather help build bridges of understanding among people.
Avoid ENVY and JEALOUSY. Everyone has a different destiny.